The Twelfth Month

*This was written yesterday*

Today, my little Gabriel James, you start your last month of babyhood. With you being our last baby (at least in our plans, ha!), I knew full well how fleeting this first year would be. The past eleven months I've taken the sleep deprivation in stride, treated myself to Biggby coffee more times than I'd like to admit, and really savored each and every moment with your sweet little cuddly self. 

In January, you were born and we brought you home to meet your brothers and get settled in. That first week you had a tongue tie clipped, mommy had a wisdom tooth pulled, and both your brothers got sick. It was eventful to say the least!

In February, we spent an entire Sunday afternoon cozied up in bed together- you napping and I watched my favorite show (in between watching you sleep, of course). 

In March, we spent our first day apart when I had an expo booth for my photography business. You did so good, and looking back I still can't believe we pulled it off! Your big brother Julian also got a bad case of hand-foot-mouth and I was worried you would get it, but you didn't thankfully!

In April as I helped my sister, your Aunt Bri, plan her wedding and threw her a shower, I realized you and I were really getting into the groove of doing life together. You became my cutest little sidekick. You also met your Uncle Nic for the first time and you got your first cold and had to get a steroid (so sad!). 

In May you stole hearts as I dressed you up in a suit and tie for your Aunt Bri's wedding. We danced together, you looking in amazement at the lights, and me savoring how little and light you felt in my arms and trying to imagine how big and tall you'll be when we dance together at your wedding someday. 

In June you went through a major sleep regression, and by doing so taught me something very important- that even though the high calling of motherhood comes with high sacrifice at times, I have the strength to proceed with grace. June stretched me and grew me in ways that never would have happened if not for you, sweetheart. 

In July you started crawling full force and many evenings found me starting at your sweet face as I nursed you to sleep, realizing how fast you were growing and thanking God for the blessing of being your mother. 

In August we spent a couple days on the lake, snuggling under a light blanket as we watched your two big brothers splash in the water. I knew it would only be a short little while before I would be snuggling alone under that blanket while all three of you played, and I squeezed you extra tight, breathing in in the smell of your sweet, soft curly hair. 

In September our lives got busier with our church life group and mid-week bible study, and I realized you were a much calmer and relaxed baby than your brother Julian was. You make it easy for me to take care of my own needs, and even though you're just a sweet innocent little baby I am grateful to you for that. 

In October you really started showcasing your sweet personality with your curiosity, smiles, new teeth and sense of humor. You especially started loving the lion and monkey on the walls by your crib, and would stare at them and smile as if you all had some kind of inside joke. 

November brought the beginnings of walking, and with it the realization that my last baby is slowly phasing out of babyhood and heading into toddlerhood. Though I must say, this age is the absolute cutest ever!

December, thus far, has had a few hiccups with you not wanting to nurse because of your new teeth coming in, as well as a nasty cold and eye virus. You've pulled out of it just fine and are in great spirits every day, even with that lingering cough. 

I'm so grateful for the ability to be home with you every day, to love on you, kiss those little cheeks raw and see all your firsts. Because even though they are firsts for you, it's bittersweet as they are lasts for me. Your first smile was my last first smile. Your first step was my last first step. The third time around, I'm truly feeling like a seasoned mother. I'm ever so aware of each fleeting moment and have made it a daily practice to take it all in slowly and with gratitude. 

You are such a sweet blessing, Gabriel James. Let's enjoy this last little bit of babyhood, together. 

Mama loves you, shhh.

Glorious Winter

This morning we all woke up to beautiful, sparkling snow blanketing our yard and trees. 

I'm really feeling winter today. It's not always wonderful, sometimes the gray days are too many and the sunny days too few, but I will always be glad I live it a state where there's winter. There's something refreshing and rejuvenating about it. It reminds me of the holidays, and it makes me want to snuggle in with my boys and watch movies and drink hot drinks and be cozy.

This winter I'm grateful. I'm grateful for my family and my chance everyday to respond to the high calling of motherhood. I'm grateful for my bible study class that is helping me grow daily in my faith. I'm grateful for my family's health, especially after having a health scare last month (weird migraine and other symptoms, MRI came back normal and physical therapy is helping, so praise!). I'm grateful for my friends who love me so well, for my sweet husband who also loves me so well and provides for our family so well. I'm grateful for our cozy home. I'm grateful for my Jesus, who makes my life so colorful. 

This winter I'm focusing on growing, in my faith, marriage and motherhood. And I'm learning what it really means to trust God, and the biggest part of that for me is taking and enjoying life as it comes. When I trust God, it's so much easier for me to find the beauty in everything, including the gray days. Today I feel like I'm carrying my own weather, that no matter how gloomy it may be outside, in my head and heart it's warm and sunny. 

I'm ready for this season, and not just ready but anticipating and expecting great things. 

Beautiful Autumn

Mid-October seems to be a special time of year for me. Of course, it is my favorite time of year so I'm sure that's why! I have two other posts from different years that were on the same day and it was all about fall nostalgia. I just love love love it!

The reason I'm writing today is the same- I had a great moment outside with my sons and I want to remember it forever. We're currently in the process of looking for another home, so I'm acutely aware that this may be my last fall in the house I've called home for the past four years and I'm trying to enjoy each day as it comes and not take anything for granted. So yesterday Zach was at school, and I took Julian and Gabriel outside in the backyard to get some fresh air. It was about 70 degrees and sunny off to the left, yet there were dark clouds looming behind the trees. It was a breathtaking scene! All the leaves in our backyard have changed color and started to fall, sprinkling our yard with yellow, orange and red.

As we were sitting in the grass, the wind really picked up and as it did it blew a TON of leaves off our tall trees right in our direction. It was literally raining leaves! The sun was shining brightly on one side, contrasted against the dark clouds on the other while a warm breeze blew leaves all through the air. It was a scene that I would imagine stirring the heart of a poet. Simply amazing.

Julian and Gabe sat there with me and we all watched silently and even though they are little I could tell they were captivated by it as well. Nature is truly beautiful, and I'm finding myself very thankful that I live in such a beautiful state.

Some people say they don't like fall in Michigan because they know what comes after- winter. Here's how I see it: You know that quote from the movie Bright Star, "I almost wish'd we were butterflies and lived three summer days. Three such days with you I could fill with more delight than fifty common years could ever contain."? This is how I feel about fall. I will gladly take six months of winter weather in exchange for one beautiful, glorious month of fall. It's worth it.

Days To Remember.

This fall has been interesting.

To be honest, the end of summer was kind of a blur. Dave has been traveling a lot for work, and was literally gone half of September. Which means, of course, I was left to wrangle the circus that is our home with three boys by myself. I love it so much, I really do, but after the fourth or fifth day of the constant whining/fighting/drama when my tank is on empty, I kind of start to go cray.

Finally things have been starting to settle- just in time for us to list our house for sale! We like excitement over here, apparently. Looking back, I realize it probably wasn't the wisest thing to buy a house, get pregnant and change jobs our first year of marriage but WE MADE IT. I'm starting to realize that's kind of how we do things, Dave and I. We have pretty high capacities, although now having three high-energy boys in the house makes things just a liiiiiitttle more crazy than normal. But that's neither here nor there.

The reason I feel the urge to write today is because the past two days have felt like true fall here in West Michigan, and I want to remember them. This will most likely be our last fall in this house, and I'm paying attention to the little changes in the weather and really enjoying them. I'm a lover of fall through and through. The dark and gloomy days, and even the sunny ones, with the crisp smell of leaves in the air, the beautiful changing colors and the smell of donuts and cider when I walk into my local farmstand- these things make me so so happy.

And as far as the circus goes, things are slightly tamer around here during the day with Zachary at school since there is nobody for Julian to fight with. That boy is SUCH a firecracker! The past two days I've realized something- even though he doesn't nap most days, he can still do quiet time in his bedroom. Oh sweet, sweet quiet time. The chances of the baby taking a nap at some point during quiet time are pretty good too, which leaves me with a tiny window of time to myself in the afternoons which I love. And you know what I've been doing with that time?

Cooking!

There's something about fall that makes me want to cook. Sometimes the gloomy days get to me, even though I love them. But taking myself into the kitchen to cook really lifts my mood and excites me, and breaking out old recipes is like greeting a good friend you haven't seen in ages but it feels like you were never apart. I've also been cooking more healthfully than normal and avoiding gluten, store bought dairy and refined sugar. Yesterday I made vegetable soup and ham & raw cheese quinoa cups. Today I made Kielbasa with peppers and onions and steamed some butternut squash. I also got some raw milk today from a local farmer! It is very tasty, but I'm finding I need to get past the *thought* of it if you know what I mean!

Tonight Dave worked downtown, so the boys and I had a fun filled night of eating good food, watching movies and doing homework to worship music. I love my (not so little) family and find myself feeling grateful tonight.

As we head further into fall with a few unknowns, I'm looking forward to many things. A move to a better home for us, more frequent date nights with my love, a healthier outlook for me with some diet changes, growing, happy and healthy boys, photography planning, being part of a rich women's bible study (BSF) group and a MOPS group, and creating new traditions as I learn the art of celebrating everything. Yes, everything. More on that in another post.

I'll leave this here for tonight- happy, excited, and thankful.

The Turn of the Tide.

I love this blog.

Looking back over the past five years I have some really sweet memories written here. When I read some of my older posts I'm thrown back into the world I lived then and the nostalgia washes over me.

Such immense sweetness.

I hope to always come back and write here in the years to come. In the past I've struggled with what exactly to do with this blog. I didn't know it at the time but inside me I was growing this desire to venture down a different writing path, one that was more focused on creativity and business as a blog subject in and of itself, but I wrestled with wanting to blog about my personal life as well. Suffice it to say I had blogger ADD and was just plain confused. ;)

I'm happy to say I've finally started another project! I'm really, really excited about it even though it's a little free wordpress blog. I have dreams of what it will look like as it grows, but right now it's in it's infant stages and I'm treating it as such. It is not going to focus on me directly or be very personal in the way this blog has been, which is why I feel so incredibly free to write uninhibited in this space now.

And I want to write on here more so that in another five years I can let the nostalgia from these present days wash over my future self. Yay yay yay!

So, for right now I am planning on sticking with this design because I love it and worked hard on it, but I will be changing the blog name and certain aspects of my navigation menu and tagline, and possibly a few other things. Stay tuned for that, and thanks for being on this journey with me!

Surviving The Soil.

When you plant a seed, there is a time before it starts to sprout when the seed seems like it's doing nothing. It's just kind of chillin' in the soil, waiting to sprout. Waiting. To. Sprout.

I'm at the point between sowing and reaping with my business. I've done the research (and still do). I've honed my skills (and still am). I'm confident with my abilities. I've determined my target market. I know my "why". I'm talking to people and networking. Yet, like all business owners experience at the start, it takes time for your business to grow. It takes time. It takes time. Again, it takes time.

I have faith that God is working not just on my business, but in my life as I continue to trust him. I might not know His ways or His timing, but I know He is right on schedule with HIS plans for my life.

So while the seed is chillin' in the soil waiting to sprout, it has a hard outer shell to keep it safe from any outside intruders. It also has enough nourishment on the inside to remain healthy until it sprouts and get nutrients from the soil. Protection. Provision. Potential.

Patience.

Wedding Fun and Gabriel's Birth

My little sister Brianne gets married this Friday! Ahh!!!

This is her and I at her Bachelorette party a couple days ago.

Isn't she cute? :)

On Saturday her and mom are both leaving- she to Texas, Mom to Florida. Mom has been staying with us since mid-April to help with wedding planning and preparation and to see Bri graduate. It was good timing too, because Dave has traveled more with his new job in the past month than he ever has and probably will have to for the rest of the year. I'm super glad to have had mom here to help with the boys and for company!

Just a quick word about Brianne's fiance Zac- he is amazing! I'm so glad my sis has found someone as sweet and fun as him and I'm really sad that they're going to live all the way in Texas. :'( They live in Austin so I guess I'll just have to make a trip out there and go see Jen Hatmaker while I'm at it.

I must say, adjusting to life with three little boys has been a whirlwind! We have had so much change this year it's insane. With the baby, Dave changing jobs, my photography stuff (I did the Lowell Expo this year!) and Bri's wedding plus wrangling the boys constantly, well, life has been busy! But you know, I have to say I'm enjoying it. I really don't feel like I missed a beat with Gabe being born. It was kinda like, hey buddy welcome to the world, now come along for the ride! He is such a cool and easy-going baby it makes me believe I could do this a few more times. We won't, hopefully haha, but still. ;)

I suppose this is where I should tell about how his birth went! That's what people love hearing about, right? At least I do. :) There's not really a whole lot to tell, but here goes.

I was nine days overdue. I felt a lot of peace during that time, of course I was anxious but being my third baby I knew the sleep I was about to lose so I took advantage of a full night's sleep as long as I could haha. I went in for a non-stress test at eight days overdue and they noticed a slight drop in his heart rate after one of the contractions and it worried them that he might not tolerate contractions well. They said he was most likely fine, but told me the risks, told me what they would do if they were me and then let me make my own decision. I loved my nurse because she really took the time to educate me on why exactly it worried them and told me the options I had, then gave me the freedom to choose what I wanted to do. She explained that I could wait it out, but the longer I waited the higher the risk so I said let's just induce. I wanted desperately to avoid it but knew it was the right thing to do for me. So I went home, called Dave's mom to stay with the boys, grabbed my packed bags and husband and we were off to the hospital.

Once we got there it took awhile to get settled in. We were in the room hanging out for a bit then my nurse came and started my IV. Once I felt the rush of fluid into my chest I immediately starting coughing and it only got worse. I asked my nurse if that was normal and she said it probably had nothing to do with the IV, that maybe I was getting a cold. I said no, I was fine a minute ago. It got to the point where I said I can't labor coughing like this. So she stopped the IV and put in a different kind of saline and I immediately stopped coughing. I forgot to get the name of the other saline she used but I guess I was allergic to it. Considering that was the only hiccup of the day and it was quickly solved, I'd say we had a great birth experience.

They started pitocin around 2:45pm. My contractions started around 4:15pm and he was born at 6:45pm. Yea, I have fast labors. It got intense real fast, and when I was 9 centimeters dilated I got an epidural. Ya'll, I've had a natural birth. It has it's benefits, but the way I see it, if I don't HAVE to feel the baby coming out then I will take advantage of that. Ha! Because the epidural takes about 20 minutes to take (or so they say), they had to give me an intrathecal shot into my spine so that I would get some relief, otherwise I would have had the baby before it kicked in. So he gave me the shot, laid me on my back and it took effect immediately. Then my nurse checked me and yep, I was complete! Time to push! I think I pushed maybe three times and Gabriel was born!

I don't know exactly why, but Gabe was the only birth that made me cry. I think with Zach I was just super exhausted and loopy and in pain, so when he was born I just felt relief. With Julian, his birth was so scary and intense and hectic that again, it was pure relief. But with Gabe, I got to experience a completely natural labor save for the pushing phase, so I had all those oxytocin hormones but tolerable pain so instead of relief that the pain was over I just felt- joy. Pure joy at meeting my perfect baby boy! Dave had cried when Julian was born but not with Gabe- he was in his element making sure I was taken care of and a lot less stressed because I wasn't screaming (at the end, anyway). Hah.

The next week was filled with craziness- Gabe had a cyst in his abdomen that needed checking up on (he is ok). He had a weird breathing thing that a lot of overdue babies have that had to be monitored and it had to improve before we could be released. He also had a tongue tie which not only made nursing extremely painful but gave us an immediate errand after we were discharged to get it clipped. A couple days after we got home I bit into a tootsie roll and broke a filling in my wisdom tooth and had to have it pulled at 5 days postpartum. Then Zach got the stomach flu. Then Julian got sick with a high fever of 103.5 for a few days. Not only was it hard for me to adjust to Julian not being my baby anymore, I couldn't even snuggle him like he needed me to and I desperately wanted to because I didn't want to be a conduit between him and the baby for whatever bad virus he had. This all happened in the first week of Gabriel's life. So yea- it was hard but amazing how we all just made it through and life went on! I have to say, Julian was such a good boy adjusting to the new baby. I mean, he's a monster most of the time because he's two ;), but he didn't seem to have an adjusting phase where he was worse than normal. And he really is so sweet, and he loves Gabe. He'll go up to Gabe and smile, then Gabe will smile back, and he'll yell "He's CUUUUUTE!!" Haha it's so stinking cute and funny it just melts my heart.

I'm trying to enjoy every minute of this season. Gabe is quite possibly my last baby, and I'm relishing in his babyhood. I kiss every little chub and roll as much as I can, and I'm looking ahead now at what the rest of my life will look like as a mom of three boys. I really do feel like my family is complete.

Now, like a good blogger, I'll leave you with some pictures!!

Waiting for baby...

                                                      

...and more waiting...

                                       

Dave of course had to leave some wise cracks on the board. :)

Julian meeting Gabe.

Zach seeing Gabe for the first time.

Pictures I took while Zach was at school, otherwise he'd be in there too. :)

I'm so tired. But life is good.

Beautiful DIY Blog Design Tips

If you’re like me and love a well designed blog but simply don’t want to spend your hard earned cash paying someone to do it, this post is for you. 

The design for this blog was done 100% by me, and I know absolutely NOTHING about coding. With a little resourcefulness and utilizing information online, you can create the look you want to achieve for your blog for little to no money. 

Here are 5 tips I have for DIYing a beautiful blog:

1. Use Google and YouTube to your full advantage.

I don’t know what I would do if it weren’t for Google. You can type in anything and in one second have a dozen articles at your fingertips. Even if you know absolutely nothing about coding (like me!), you can almost always find an article or video that will walk you through the process. Make sure to Google very specific questions, like “how to hide ‘showing all posts with label’ from blogger” and other questions of the like.

Searching the web for coding questions isn’t for the faint of heart, and sometimes you’ll have to read and try out the advice of 5 or 6 different articles before you find one that works for you. That’s ok! It’s better than shelling out big bucks to have someone do it for you, in my opinion. Plus it’s rewarding to know that you designed this yourself! 

2. Get lots of freebies. 

This is something I can’t encourage you to do enough. There are so many great free resources online! One in particular I love is called Angie Makes (www.angiemakes.com). She has a “freebies” link (as many design sites do) where you can view and download all sorts of images and even free wordpress templates. To find even more great sites like hers, you can- you got it- Google it!

Another great way to get awesome freebies for your blog is by subscribing to newsletters. Online business and marketing is so hot right now, and everyone knows that the BEST way to get your content in front of your target market is to have a newsletter. And if you’re business savvy, you know that the best way to get people to subscribe to your newsletter is to give away free stuff! Beautiful stock photography, ebooks, informational guides, gorgeous graphics and many, many more great blog design goodies can be delivered straight to your inbox simply by signing up for newsletters. Take advantage!

3. Familiarize yourself with a design program, preferably Photoshop.

Okay, so I am bias toward Photoshop and will say if you already have it, use it! I absolutely love it and think you will take your design skills to a whole ‘notha level. But since this is advice on how to design without spending money, if you don’t already have Photoshop there are some great free resources available. 

PicMonkey is a great site for designing graphics and editing photos. They do give you the option to upgrade for a very small fee ($5-$10 per month) to have access to all of their features, but the free ones alone are more than enough to create beautiful visual content. 

Another great site to use is Canva. They are a great design website where you can make graphics for your blog, social media, or even postcards and invitations. They have a great stock photography collection, most of which are free and some that are $1. You can also upload your own photos into Canva which makes it even better to use! 

There are other free design programs out there, these are just a couple that I have found useful. If you want to find even more options, just ask Google! While I highly recommend Photoshop, I believe that you can achieve your design goals with these free programs and a little resourcefulness. 

4. Pay attention to fonts.

If I’m being completely honest, I’m a bit of a font junkie. I absolutely love how pairing just the right fonts can bring your blog to life! The first thing to do is decide what kind of fonts jump out at you and what look you’re trying to achieve. It is best to pair fonts together as opposed to using just one, but I wouldn’t use more than three as it can made your blog look cluttered. If you’re going for a busy-looking site then it might be ok, but the general rule is 2-3 fonts. Crisp, clean, and simple branding is the hot trend right now,  so keep that in mind as you venture on. 

Pinterest is a great resource for font pairings and helps you get a visual of the style you like. I have found that once I have a general idea, there are many different fonts that look similar to each other. This is great news because if you fall in love with one specific font but then realize it costs $50, there is a really good chance that there is a similar one that is free. DaFont is my favorite site for free fonts, but there are many others as well. Again, we’re talking free to cheap design, so while sometimes it might seem a sacrifice to get the free font over the $30 one that you are in love with, I urge you to get it up on your blog to test it out. You might just find that you love it just as much!

5. Stay inspired and check out trends. 

There are so many beautiful websites out there not to mention blog designers who love to showcase their portfolios. Those are some of the best places to get inspiration from. I also use Pinterest a lot for design inspiration, and have boards to save the pins I love so I can look them up easily when I’m designing. You can also Google “blog design” or  “blog design tips” and find some really good resources. When you come across a stunning blog or website, make sure to pay attention to the details of it. Are the fonts crisp and clean or more whimsy, or both? Is there a color scheme? How and where do they present their information? 

I never stop searching for inspiration and always try to pay attention to what other designers are doing. Even though I’m not a trained or paid designer, I have enough resourcefulness to figure out how to achieve the look I am going for- and so can you! 

I hope you found these tips useful! Enjoy!

Nesting: The Final Days of Pregnancy

I can't believe it's already here (on the 6th) - my due date! Pregnancy seems so long and it kind of is, but once the end comes it just seems to come out of nowhere. Until a few days ago, I was almost in denial that I had less than a week before my due date. Even though we are pretty much all prepared for Baby's big arrival, it seems surreal that we will be adding another sweet little member to our family. Part of me is anxious about the changes to come, because we have such a steady family dynamic with the four of us. Another part of me thinks that since we already have two, maybe it won't be as big of a change this time around. I have heard and been warned that the third can be the hardest but I am remaining optimistic. I really think it will be great!

Because I love looking back on life, I thought it would be fun to reflect on the past nine months while they are still fresh in my mind. It's amazing how much of pregnancy is forgotten years later. This is what it has been like this time around:

May was a hard month. We had just found out we were expecting and I had the beginnings of morning sickness. I suppose I can wrap June into this one as well, because it was one big huge blur of crap- just being honest! I was sick all. day. long. From sun up to sun down. I never actually threw up, which I think might have actually brought some relief from the terrible constant nausea. I was also completely exhausted, more so than either of my previous pregnancies. It was basically like I was recovering from the stomach flu for two months straight. I tried so many things to get relief and nothing really worked all that well. I even had prescription meds, which might have just kept me from throwing up which might have been more of a curse than a blessing.

It was also during this time, about March-May, that I realized I loved photography. In June I was a second shooter in a wedding with a friend and I felt AWFUL morning-sickness wise. But I did it! I made it a whole ten hours and completely collapsed in my bed at the end of the day. But it was so worth it!

In July the fog started to lift. By the time I was 14-15 weeks I was able to go off my medicine and actually eat meals again. :) It was glorious! There were a few things I was still feeling quite averted to (like coffee, wah) but overall was much better. I did quite a few park dates with my boys and just really enjoyed a leisurely summer. During this month I started to think about the possibility of starting a photography business. I was doing it just for fun at this point and enjoying it so much, and was getting a lot of positive feedback. It was during this month that I started working on my website as a way to showcase my work and give information to anyone who might be interested to work with me.

In August I second-shot for another wedding and the lady I shot for was so so encouraging and really helped me learn so much! I continued to work on my website and changed the look multiple times. I really scoured the internet for cool free graphics and learned a lot about photoshop. I also learned a lot about photo editing in lightroom. I spent many many nights up until the wee hours of the morning (I'm talking 2-3am!) working on all of it, simply because I LOVED it and it was really the only time I had to focus without the kids. Also, Dave and Julian both had birthdays at the end of August, and I had a lot of fun throwing them a little party. :) I really had two worlds going on, growing a business and loving on/ taking care of my family.

In September-October I was still feeling great- not too big or uncomfortable and no more morning sickness. I was focusing a lot on my website, a relaxed & unofficial business plan, and more shooting gigs- on top of engaging my husband, boys and managing our home. It sounds like it should have been super crazy, but really it wasn't! I worked on my stuff at night after the boys went to bed about 4-5 nights a week, and sometimes I would take an hour or two during the day. I had some stressful days when I was "stuck" on something or another, usually computer related, and would get so frustrated I would have to just walk away for awhile. But to be completely honest- the only reason I was doing it in the first place was because I was truly enjoying it, despite the frustrating moments.

In October I also started feeling the effects of my anemia and had to take it a little easier than in the previous months. I have beta-thalassemia, which is a genetic anemic blood trait that basically means I have small red blood cells. Each pregnancy I've been told to take a whole bunch of extra iron- which helps some but not completely since I technically don't have iron deficiency anemia. It's weird- most people in my family have this since we come from Mediterranean descent. Pregnancy is the only time it has ever bothered me, as it usually has no symptoms. Once the end of October came, I had to prioritize and work around my fatigue. Some days were worse than others, and grocery shopping was the bane of all my responsibilities. Oh, how I loathed it! :) Side note: In December I found out about Meijer's curbside service and have never looked back. If they ever stop it my heart will shatter into a million pieces. It really is too good to be true!

In November I really started slowing down. Each day was different than the next fatigue-wise, and I was anxious to just be DONE with my website and move on. It started to get old at this point. The problem was that I was super picky, and tried a lot of different things before deciding they didn't look quite right and would change them. It was a vicious cycle, and I refused to pay someone to do it because I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted but knew I would know once I saw. Plus, I'm not technically profitable yet and not willing the invest the money until I am. So there's that.

December was so much better. I knew I would be huge pregnant by Christmas time, so I was very motivated to prepare for that and get everything we needed done in a relaxed way. I made a ton of lists for Christmas shopping and baby preparation, FINISHED MY WEBSITE, and changed my vitamins which ended up helping immensely with my fatigue. I was very intentional to savor the time with my boys. I finished my photography grunt-startup work so I could take a break before Baby is born, and really enjoyed sharing the business news with my family, friends, and on facebook. Then I really hit Christmas shopping and baby preparation. About a week or two before Christmas my nesting kicked in and since then I've been riding an immense wave of energy, thankfully! I've gotten so much done and have been really good at keeping up with the house, with the help of my sister Alannah who has done so much for me!

I also feel the need to mention that Dave and I have gone on a weekly date night throughout this entire pregnancy with the help of my very selfless Dad who committed to watching our boys. Aside from pregnancy and photography, one thing I look back on over this past year so fondly is the quality time I've had with my husband. I really feel prepared to enter into the newborn stage again in part because we've been so intentional about investing in each other consistently. We even plan to continue our dates after Baby comes, they'll just be a little shorter. :) We also love getting into shows together, and realized that American Idol is starting up soon which will be nice to watch together in our sleep deprived blur. Hah!

Overall, so many wonderful things have grown along with my sweet baby over the past nine months, and I am feeling so blessed and so ready to meet him and start the next chapter.